What I’m about to tell you is something that you would have never realized is the root of all your problems. It has nothing to do with the type of person you are. It has nothing to do with how smart, talented, or capable you are. It has nothing to do with your experiences, your strengths, or your weaknesses as a human. And it, for sure, has nothing to do with the way you look in accordance to the standards of beauty.
But it does have everything to do with the way you stand.
Yes. I want to talk to you about standing. The mechanics of it. It’s a simple concept. Let me break it down for you. Ready?
You are a human. Your bones are stackable. They are designed to sit each on top of the other so that you may balance with gravity and form an erect shape on Earth. The way you stand will solve all of your problems.
(For those of you who cannot stand because of some physical restriction on your body, and are forced to sit or lay until further notice, I urge you to IMAGINE standing up straight. Your thoughts are just as valid in the standing process as physically standing is.)
Body language is a thing, you guys. People will read off a “vibe” you are subconsciously giving out to the universe and make assumptions about you. Those assumptions will then lead to their opinion on whether or not you seem to be someone of value, which will then, dictate how they will interact with you.
Now, yes, go ahead, tell me, “Jacqueline, it doesn’t matter what people think of me! This is my life. I shouldn’t have to worry about them. They don’t matter!!”
And yes, you are right.
But also, you’re extremely wrong.
Because when it comes to getting a job, being given a chance, being offered an opportunity, those things are dependent on the people you share the world with on a daily basis. It’s important to understand that perception is reality. And sometimes your reality is dependent on other people’s perception of you. ESPECIALLY in the entertainment industry.
“JACQUELINE, I DON’T NEED THEM, I AM THE MAKER OF MY OWN FUTURE, I GRANT MYSELF OPPORTUNITY, THIS ADVICE DOESN’T APPLY TO ME, IT’S USELESS, YOU ARE USELESS, GOODBYE.”
Okay, you mammoth. Stop reading. Go away. And then come back after you’ve become frustrated with your efforts (about 5 of my future blog posts later), so you can read #11, “You can’t do it alone.” Go ahead, I believe in you. I’m rooting for you. And when you fail, I’ll be here for you when you get back.
For those of you that stayed….I will continue:
At the beginning of everything you try, you’re resources will be limited. There is going to be a percentage of time where you are going to be dependent on the opportunities someone else has to offer you. You need to make sure that you are making yourself available to those opportunities by presenting yourself accordingly; your trustworthiness, your confidence, your knowledge, your loyalty, your stature, your abilities, all presented simply in the way that you STAND.
Stack yo’self up!
People who stand up straight seem confident, they seem ready, they seem capable, but most importantly, they seem steady and balanced. This is extremely appealing to anyone looking to hire, talk, date, or interact with you. Why? Because they will classify you as something unwavering, sure of themselves, and therefore, a valuable asset to their world.
Think about it this way: if the odds of winning the lottery were a sure thing, you’d bet all your money on it wouldn’t you?
Standing up with both feet on the ground, shoulders stacked, and tall, clicks a switch in people’s brains that says to them, “THIS PERSON KNOWS WHAT THEY ARE DOING AND THEY SHOULD BE RESPECTED, TRUSTED, AND LISTENED TO WHEN THEY SPEAK BECAUSE THEIR THOUGHTS ARE GOLDEN. I NEED TO BET ALL MY MONEY ON THEM.”
True story, that is the word-for-word actual thoughts of strangers looking at you from a short distance. Every time. Every person. Same thoughts. WORD. FOR. WORD.
Now let’s say you finally figure out how to stand, and people start responding to you in a more positive way….the next thing I’m about to tell you is key. (I learned this during my actor training in Texas: the state that tried to kill me. More on that later.)
THIS IS KEY:
WHEN YOU START GETTING POSITIVE RESPONSES FROM THE WORLD AROUND YOU, DO NOT fuck it up by speaking back to them like a goober and avoiding eye contact.
Or else, you, my friend, are an imposter stander.
The interior must match its exterior, or it doesn’t work. That’s why I want to talk about how important it is to not only stand up straight, but speak with distinction. Use clear words and phrases, enunciate, and look at people in the eye when you do so. Otherwise, WHAT other reason would they have to stay and listen to you once they’ve decided to gravitate in your direction?
“ON TO THE NEXT!” They’ll say.
It is important that you stand by what you promote. Stand up and speak up for yourself. Tell people what your standards are. Keep them high so that you attract other tall upstanding people into your life. These people SHAPE you. They solidify your standards to other people. They keep you in check. And they help you grow.
Repetition, so it sticks: Standing up tall, again, I tell you, you help you. It will open you up to all the opportunities there ever were; both the ones people grant you, and the ones you grant yourself. You will look balanced, and therefore, sure of yourself. And if you’re sure of yourself, what evidence do other people have to not be sure of you too?
The answer is none. They will have none. There will be no reason to doubt you. At all. They won’t even question it.
So stop slouching. Stop speaking under your breath. Stop looking at the floor. And listen to what I’m telling you.
Go ahead, try it.
I’m saving your life right now.